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8 Reasons I'm Not Homeschooling My Kid


by Andrea Mulder-Slater


A few years ago when I was throwing around the idea of homeschooling my daughter, I had a discussion with a friend of mine over coffee and goldfish crackers while our kids played with wooden trains. I explained that one of my fears about teaching my child at home was that she might grow up to be “strange” and “awkward”, to which my friend remarked, “Oh, so you were homeschooled?"

A Moron with a Mouthful of Magic

by Andrea Mulder-Slater

I love the online health food store because where else I can place an order for Vitamins B, C and D while lounging in yoga pants and eating chocolate - snapped into bite-sized pieces because fewer calories – without being judged by 25 year old yogis drinking beet juice behind the counter.

These chips are organic Sasha. I'm hurting myself if I don't eat them.

Then there are the random free samples offered at time of checkout.

Once I received a minuscule tube, inside of which was just enough eye cream to moisturize my fingertips. Then there was the tiny bottle of zinc ointment, which - to this day - I still carry around in my purse. Not long ago, it was a trial size teeth-whitening system, including magic minty toothpaste.

Because I’ve always been curious about people with glow-in-the-dark incisors, this freebie made me a little more excited than usual.

FALLING. YOU'RE DOING IT (and other things) WRONG

by Andrea Mulder-Slater

When I was a kid, I broke my wrists.

A few times.

In fact, I was so good at collecting casts in the emergency room, I once fell and sprained my left wrist while my right arm was wrapped already in plaster.

Falling off a chair, scratching my back while jumping into a pile of leaves and slipping on a pillowcase while running down a hallway are just three of the ways I wounded myself when I was between the ages of 5 and 7.

The Best Damn Gluten-Free Ginger Snaps. Ever.

by Andrea Mulder-Slater


I've been eating (mostly) gluten-free for about four years now. It all started after I had my daughter. During pregnancy, I had three basic cravings: vanilla (steamers, milkshakes, pudding), french fries (McDonald's) and saltine crackers (Premium Plus). In fact, during my first trimester, I gorged myself on anything and everything wheat-based. By the time my baby was born, I was back to eating in a healthy, balanced way. But, I had developed a penchant for breads, cookies and crackers.

Your Mom, Only Better (Dutch Maternity Nurses)



by Andrea Mulder-Slater

The hour-long drive home from the hospital where my daughter was born was fraught with danger.

First, there was my perineum (if you have to ask, you just don’t get it). Then, there was the night sky, which meant that for the first time since her birth, I was unable to keep constant watch over my infant. The bumpy road and unfamiliar sounds and smells led to the overwhelming realization that I was in need of another painkiller and had exactly zero experience keeping a miniature human being alive.